Thank You❤! 1K+ Followers

Hey beautiful people! If you are reading this you are probably one of my WP family member. Thank you so much for following me and you have been great critic, follower and most importantly friend, means a lot to me!We are 1K+ people in here! 

Here is the list of best of my posts I have written till date, please do checkout these if you haven’t already coz these are some of the best things I have ever written: 

• A day of unity
• The truth of the lie
• Illusions of pain and Realisation of my Real Aim
• A Gift every Woman deserves and The Battle Between Feminism and Individualism
• Your story and mine
• 11 Things I Have Learned From Blogging
• My Type of Love!

(Also comment which one of my posts do you like the most, would be a such a pleasure to know! )

❤Thank you so much its been so much fun having you all here and I have learned many things. 

I started blogging after a major change in my life, I usually don’t talk about my life in any of my posts but this story has an important role in  my blog journey!It all started after a major change and adding to that I had also lost many of my true friends, it was quite  a thing that happens when you start growing up, I have started blogging since then not only blogging but I had started many new things to change my zone of sadness. I started reading more and I focused back on my studies,  its been sorrow and sadness to extreme fun that is my present day life story. But adding to all of it I have grown up immensely at mental level from past one year, I started blogging around November end, 2016 and here we are.

Every comment,  like, reblog and follow means a lot to me and this post was not just to inform you that I have crossed 1K followers it was to tell you that it is possible because of you, so Thank you! This is the list of people who have a huge contribution as they follow me from a long time, have given genuine feedback,  have nominated me for many awards,  and it would never be possible without their support. Do checkout their blogs!: 

• VaasStewart
• FabWritings
• Deepika di 
• Mehul Singla
• Christopher Bland
• Kawsreflections
• SumitOfficial
• thebeyoutifulgal!
• Hati03nisa
•  Shayra 
• Mr. Lonely
• Vinnieh
• aquibview
• And many more…..

Ambition on fleek, long way to go. Hope you enjoyed this post and I will see you soon and don’t forget to comment one of my posts that you have liked the most so that I can know better what you all like to read! Thank you!❤Much love, xoxo! 

YOU ARE AMAZING! Remember that! ❤🌹

Are you forgetting someone?

Are we ready for what sets in? Pain! Deepest of yours carved in the heart! Not my first post on pain but can you imagine what we carry as pain and sadness is mostly the result of something damn good not happening in our long lasting lives, we have all been there. You don’t really know what this feeling is its just sudden incompleteness blended with hopelessness mixed with anxiety and its just not a good thing to experience.

You know what the thing is, even if everyone agrees you don’t need a reason to be happy ,our brains are conditioned from birth that happiness is a result of gaining or getting what you want, its a destination. Go ahead deny that and I m with you, but philosophy cannot be the reality always.There’s a phase sometimes when nothing bad has actually happened but neither has something good happened, its all in vain type of feeling.

You might have often heard you need to feed your brain, when everything is going well at that time its  important to do something intentionally that makes you happy, understand not pleasure but happiness or contentment. Pleasure is just a moment or two kind of feeling like the one you get after drinking coffee or eating chocolate. Though that can act as triggers and make you feel better throughout the day, but won’t help you heal the helplessness.

What happens with me when I get into a state like this is, I actually feel a very hopeless and helpless and merrygo rounds of thoughts continue, but later I realised that from when I have started doing a few things that don’t require much effort, they help me cope up with this sadness or incompleteness, not only with this but it can be a way out of bad day!

I think we all should have such few things! Like journaling, going for a walk, coffee with your life’s hero, prayer time,music, just going out, movie marathon and one thing that always works is completing something that I have started like writing a draft blog, assignment completion or maybe finishing the book or anything like that which gives you satisfaction of doing something productive .Most importantly sit down and listen to myself. Cry it out or write it out or anything.  In short,  shut all the things and give yourself some attention and importance. 

We all know that we should stay happy and you cannot deny the fact we like to make others happy or please others or say it otherwise we don’t like the fact that others aren’t pleased by us. Before this motive that you’ll make others happy, I think we should concentrate on ourseleves.Some people say “nobody loves me” or “I don’t have love in my life”, but I d read somewhere you don’t need to get love or you don’t need someone who loves you all the time,  you need to be love. Make yourself feel good and everthing on this earth will be good, not just when days are bad but also when days are going good.

In this hustle of day and night  we often forget that we have a child inside us who needs attention, who wants to cry when it hurts, who wants stop because he is tired, who wants to play, dance and sing,who doesn’t wants to care about what anyone thinks,  who wants to feel loved by someone, who craves for a pampering experience, who cannot hide his feelings for too long,   who wants to be free and happy. Maybe today you should listen to him and give attention to what he wants because what he wants is the most important thing in your life. Give him some time, this post was just to remind you that let him not die, because maybe you don’t realize that he still exists…. 
Today fall in love…. ❤……….with yourself

 

Feelings & Frankness

Where do you find yourself in this busy world? Sometimes what we want is not what we get. On an average in today’s world its cool to be bad you know. Maybe the “bad” tag makes you stronger from inside, because its cool. But there is so much burried inside a person and what a person speaks is just a fraction of it, sometimes we really want to apologise or maybe even say I love you, but we hold it to our trueselves, our feelings. We are insecure, don’t know what for. When you are honest, life gets simpler, not to forget that there’s a fine line between honest and rude, though both can occur simultaneously.

Should we let go our feelings or hold it inside?  What works for you? Maybe not everyone can suddenly be the bravest and the most motivated person ever and go and face the world with “damn! I m honest” attitude, its not as easy as “damn! I m hot as hell” attitude.

What I think is we should let go our feelings and express them in the best possible way in that situation. Or else what happens is the endless cycle of thoughts, and thoughts and more thoughts, guilts and grugdes and hate and then guilt again and self hate and so on. Its hard at first but you know what for a fact I find honest people really attractive, if you can say it on face I think you will have less relationship issues, communication is solution to thousands of problems.And ” #no filter life” will surely give you a happier version of yourself.  On the note that I m talking about relationships and people, please don’t take them for granted, you’ll regret it. Life would be so simpler if people spoke what they meant, its even cooler than sarcasm sometimes.

Its easy to judge others or maybe effortless, but its just very frustrating to keep record of what you are upto, letting out is hard at first  but please try it once, life just gets easier when it gets simpler. Its all so mismatched right? You know they say we should have a hobby or a thing of that sort that allows us to release our feelings… Tired? So am I but maybe for all screw ups and all mistakes sometimes you need to give yourself and all the others around you a second or third or maybe Nth chance, coz we all are not on same level of screw ups and madness in our lives. Yes talking is the solution! Maybe a step to set ourseleves and others free. Afterall, best people in life are free. 

Lets start it here! So give a really honest feedback about this post or about my blog or whatever you feel, being honest and you can be critical you know I like criticism and I would love to know your thoughts on this post! Ambition on fleek! See you and hope you are having a great day and just because you are reading this breath in, breath out, leggo and smile:) ! Damn now that’s beautiful❤! 

After Love…

Look what you did to me,

I have started loving me,

late nights and early mornings just to escape those dream of yours,

 hard work is my new love,

after the love wars, fighting with the world seems so easy,

the argument between heart and the brain keeps me busy, 

hustling way through life in the deep dark midnight,

I wake up and dress up with that stubborn heart ready for the war,

the wrong road you left me on is the way to my marvellous  destiny,

my life is a dream after all those cuts and midnight screams,

unleashed I m, I bloom like rose ,though thorns are covered, still they make a part of me that you can’t see,

magic of love after the betrayal, I have never been so happy ever,

a gift you gave in a face of mistake,

the sun is shining brighter, my heart feels lighter,

this is the story of my life,

after love,

cuts and scars, self hate game and whole world to blame,

and games that you have played and look here I finally played my ace, 

a new me is released, which was imprisoned in love,

 come watch someday I invite you to my life,

though rememeber  you’ll be here to watch coz that’s your worth infront of my heart, 

no there’s no one like you and you can be proud,  you were just beautiful lie ,

which leaves me stronger and healed,

everyday is a game,

thrill, fun and excitement no space here for pain,

 from victim to game changer,

look how I survive through the danger,

This is me after love,

when the hurts get healed,

I feel  strong and relieved,I have blown my mind 

You taught me to fight

 thanks for this life,

and you are the only reason behind this story, I could find…. 

To A Broken Person…

Somedays you think of life, think of what you are ,what everything around you  is ,

 and the six coffee mugs one after the other, 

the chair of  laziness that just doesn’t let you go, you are awake till middle of the nights and you pretend to be busy but you too know you aren’t this lazy, 

 and you are angry because they aren’t   accepting  you to be crazy,

when will you realise you are running away from nobody  but yourself, 

that fifteen hour playlist that is unending, 

look into your eyes from whom are you hiding ,what exactly are you  seeking, 

you know you should be grateful, but you are too broken to be grateful ,

 you are tired and frustrated and you don’t know why you randomly get irritated, 

so high then suddenly so low where are these mood swings leading to ,

 anxiety has polluted the heart, too bored to create another work of art, 

they call it symptoms of depression and recommend you medication but no medicine has ever healed a broken heart and then you say poetry works best for you,

  you dress so well and try your best to show that you are better than the rest and then streets of approval and judgments just gets open as you walk through hallways, there are eyes staring at you with amaze and an unexplainable expression, 

you are too confused  and irritated and you stare at your watch all day long for when you’ll be home and close the doors and cry letting out all your emotions,

 cut throat competition for words of appreciation,

 and everyday the hardest question to answer becomes how are you and you lied because according to them its not okay to be not okay,

  you never knew that you are becoming a better liar as days slip through your hands,

those hands and wrist full of cuts and burns whom are you giving pain to have you forgotten? 

 Love and fame and you are bored again and you expect everyday to be different from the other but you see its all the same as you have done and known already, 

waiting for that perfect partner you forgot love is not be found it is to be felt never but now,

 you hate the rythm stuck in your head waiting for you to burn another cigarette ,

and through smoke you sigh because they’ll label you weak if you cry, 

and you have understood chemistry well enough to know that alcohol is  a solution,  

look your heart is house of fears ,your dreams and excitement all got burried in your body which seems to be grave to a sassy you of yesterday ,

you still are the bravest person on earth until its night and truth unleashes, 

ask for life but not acceptence screams your heart,

you wish you could explain how broken you are at heart ,no you dont need words of sympathy because amazingly its all fake coz it seems like there exists no empathy,

 some nights after crying you experience an emotion that’s the true pleasure to your broken heart,

and you wake up and cycle repeats, its like an endless well you fell into and it gets darker and darker as it gets deeper and deeper,

if your feelings could be written into a book, you would bet it would be a bestseller, because you know people love to laugh at others sorrow or maybe it gives them peace to see reflection of their own, 

you sit with the blades on some nights and wonder if death was better than life and you make another cut which brings you in middle of death and life,and this is what you call your night life, 

and one fine morning that doesn’t come so often you wake up with determination and try to fix the problem, but then you realise that you have no idea what is exactly the problem,

emptiness, loneliness, depression or sadness, you have googled a zillion times to come out of it and  to know what’s the actual problem ,

you are tired of guessing -meditation, books,  diet, friends or yoga what might be the solution? 

it seems you are sinking into a deep blue sea even when you know how to swim, you are still sinking , you are breathless and restless and still in silence, and you sink and you sink and you wait for the moment you’ll take your last breath,

and when someone says you aren’t sad and questions your broken state, you could debate like the highest of lawyers to protect that what causes you suffering,   but silence is your answer, 

overwork is your escape and often it prevents you from making those selfhate mistakes,

its like a phase and you know it will pass,

but you wonder where those dreams to run to the moon flew away, to be that buisness tycoon disappeard,

you wish you could tell your story so you write some poetry but as you write your tears drip and fall on paper and its all messed up and wet and you have some pieces of art under your bed, and under those ashtrays and many other places but they are never read,

it seems you have fallen and gotten up and tried too many times, and somedays I wonder how can a person be as brave as you are and you survive through everyday,

so until these dark clouds pass as you know they will, countinue with courage and that nerve of steel, and you know that  someday sun will rise  and you know it will be as good as magic and it will happen coz they say magic happens to those who believe,

even if you know you have a very less hope to be saved remember death can never be a solution ,  keep guessing what is the solution and keep on trying but still smile sometimes until its all done,  because you know there’s a kind of beauty even in pain and pleasure could never serve you as well as pain …. 

I had dressed to decieve but….

Look here I wiped my tears, I woke up again from hate and despair,

I decided to dress to decieve ,  so that I don’t reveal the pain and greif, 

I showered with the scent of jasmine, I wiped myself with the cream,

I attired myself in the full sleeve dress so the beauty of cuts I made on my wrist and the lines made on my soft skin from that sharp knife don’t get revealed,

I put the mascara to hide those puffed eyes, which are desperate to tell that I cried all night,

I thought of how I am  gonna do my hair, which reminded me of those rough hands which played with my hair ,

I wish I could take a time machine and live that moment again and so I did, I bit my lips again to stop my tears  and I rushed down the stairs to seek my time machine, I opened the cupboard and sat by the sofa with that big album, my time machine,

I saw you smiling at the very first page and for the zillionth time my heart broke in grief,

you captured my heart which was a fire and kind of art but you droped it so hard that my whole world was burnt,

I remembered I was covering myself with a coat of “Im okay” and I headed to the dressing table, 

I stared at the mirror, like you my eyes also fascinate me somedays, when I look deep into them I see my whole world and amazingly all I see is you, 

I caked on the makeup and rushed towards the kitchen and I poured the wine in the glass and I felt  like I had lost my last breath with the just a glass, 

it looked like the sky was in pain too,  when I saw the black clouds covering the sun’s face,

the forecast was wrong and the strom of grief  was about to come, I wish I had doubted not the forecast but also you and promises you made randomly out of the blue,

I stepped out of the house and same as all the days I wore a fake smile on my face and it begun to rain and I was cleansed from bottom to the top and to the greatest depths of my heart, and corpse in my body then got burnt, 

my emotions went numb and I was scattered into infinite pieces like never before, my broken pieces got revealed, the heart so stabbed was freezed as hard as steel, 

I wish that we would have never met, I wish the destiny should have not knit this story of threat I got the love I always wished for, I wish I had wished for it to last, 

but then I smiled in pain , I was happy not because I was betrayed because before the betrayal I  was loved, I loved the most beautiful lie, the most attractive illusion the destiny had presented infront of me,

I loved from all my heart, I gave it all I had and   I loved like the fire in stars no matter how beautiful it looks you’ll never be worthy of touching it, I felt like the storm trapped in  a rain drop and so I cried out my heart, 

from head to toe  I felt so healed,silence was my loudest scream,   I felt its okay to cry sometimes, doesn’t the sky do the same and we call it rain,

You see I had dressed to decieve the world so well,  but the rain revealed me and this is me for forever, beautiful and healed .…

I won’t tell you to get up…

Somewhere maybe I m still with you,

I know you don’t realize, the words that criticize will disappear,

I know you don’t have arms you can run into and cry out all the pain,

I know you crave for a hug that comforts all the pain ,

I know you close the doors and weep, so loud you scream in your head, it aches in each bit of your flesh,

I know you have been strong for long and pretended to be happy since forever,

and once more like everyone says I won’t tell you to get up quickly again when you fall,

I suggest you to stay there, feel the pain, accept it coz not everything will  always be alright, coz the life needs to get divided into day and night, 

I know long you have fought and again and again you were hurt, your heart was burnt but still you survived, for this reason give some place to  pride,

let tears flow down through those cheeks, whose dimples made me think of world’s sweetest things,

scream when alone, cry it out coz when tears get revealed they’ll laugh with a feel of  excite,

I won’t tell you to smile back and that someday it will be okay, coz honesty I don’t know when is that day,

just stay there fallen until your tears dry and the morning gives you strength to awake and walk again with courage knowing that you’ll fall again,

I know that your  heart was not broken it was burnt, but trust me someday you’ll know the value of the lessons you have learnt,

I know I m not there to hold your hand and pull you up and hug you tight and lie to you that its gonna be alright,

you have no idea what is the power of your smile, but just look into the mirror when your eyes are full of tears and then  show  some courage and smile you’ll know the reason why I tell that your smile can end the wars and convert stone of sadness into happinness like gold,

suffocation in the emptiness of air, loneliness in grief and despair, these are darker shades of life I know you had never seen,

you get up and you fall, and again it repeats and repeats and every time your heart beats its the same rythm of sigh, in the fear what could possibly come next? 

 in this world no matter how much they hate you, somewhere somehow you are wanted and loved and maybe even missed by someone, maybe a little less but always more than none,lets not talk about hope and positivity and strength, because deep inside your heart you know they’ll always remain words until they are felt,

they tell you there is always a hope and there is a hand which will magically come to help, let me tell you something you won’t get up until you really want to,

give yourself sometime maybe because you have forgotten that time was always yours and start again with embracing those imperfect flaws, 

you rule over you, nobody else but you get to decide who are you, the answer of that how are you does not always needs to be fine,

 because in a poem not every  word does rhym, then how would everyday be same?

it would be as boring as repeating the same level of a game,

here’s a little secret to the brave person fallen apart, whose strength and hope are scattered around, who has tangled all those relationships and bounds, whose heart is full of wounds,

I won’t tell you to get up, if you want to you can stay there  but whenvever you make up your mind just remember at the end what matters is you, if you want to you can start it all new, or fix those old mistakes with a little effort or two but just remember all that matters at the end is you! 

Dear bhai….

Dear bhai,

I know you are in that big city, where all the people are tall and pretty,

where the roads are endless,  where the tall  buildings seem to touch the sky unlike our small village with forests near by, 

I just wanted to ask, that could I  visit too ? 

books that you read and broken pencils of yours and the empty room of yours,they make me cry bhai, I hug your old t-shirt and wipe my tears, 
in this house so big where I and nana live, I feel alone like a  ghost, 

I draw, do chores, and revise those small alphabets and words you taught me then, and now I have learnt to write letters holding those broken pens, 

I wonder some days are you playing hide and seek? To seek you,  I open all those empty cupboards and look behind the door, but to my surprise now that big arms don’t come and hug me from behind, and like always where were you hidden ,I couldn’t  find. 

And the hallucination breakes, and I think of you and remembering all those memories was all my mistake,

 I look at that white sky and imagine how big would be infinity, 
I stare at these empty roads

I wander in my dreams, I wake up in middle of the night with screams, 

through the little window I measure the sky,

I wonder why you  all have locked me inside?

Why didn’t you let me go to places I always wanted to go and why didn’t you take me along with you? 

atleast you could send me to that school nearby,

I compare myself not to humans but to those birds who fly freely in the sky, 

nana said that girls are like precious gems, so we keep them  safe in the treasure,

but without you I feel like a stone fallen on road  which is kicked again and again  ,but still not broken 

my eyes  flood tears and a day seems to be like thousand years,

alone one desire I hold to go to school like others,

I hope one day you come and take me to that paradise of yours and not much I ask but please  reply to  this letter of mine, 

your memories have started hurting, I wonder why don’t you miss me?

Have you found another sweet sister like me? Do you also hug her when you come back home? But you said you loved me more than anyone, not full but a little bit of love could you give me too? 

every night nana says  you’ll never come and you’ll never reply, but this time too my hope did not die,

and not much I ask but please reply to  this letter  and remind me that I have the world’s best brother. 

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Hey! How are you wonderful people? 

 🍁And for those of you who don’t understand hindi- bhai means brother and nana means grandfather.

I would love to know your thoughts on this post so please comment!😊 

An Angel with Red Rose…

The black clouds were on the head, they covered the sun and marked the threat and rain of grief began,

lightning did happen, and the night came to play, the crowd rushed here &there, 

the day I lost my job, and the sky did sigh in grief,

the drops of water hurted me like thorns of hell,

my tears were covered, I was wet in pain &grief,

the shops soon got emptied, doors& windows got closed,

near the station I saw a little girl standing on the road with a red rose,

I saw her smile looking up at sky,

wet she was like me but she giggled lovingly with no worry, 

with curosity and dilemma blended in my head, I asked her where did she live,

she giggled again and said “the place where you have kept your feet, that is the ground on which I eat and sleep,”

I asked again what are you doing here in this heavy rain? 

with excitment she answered, I m seeing the magic in rain, 

What magic was it I asked her again, she replied “the drops changed their colour every now and then,”

I forgot the sorrow when she gifted me a smile,

I questioned that why was she holding a rose in the hand, she answered -I picked it up when a girl dropped it out of furstration and anger in head,

Where will you sleep tonight  I asked,

she answered “beneath the magical stars and the beautiful black sky after the magic show ends by” 

the conversation with this little genius did not last too long,

it rained and with another strike of lightning 

 she bounced and danced and dissappeared  before I knew, 

I felt the joy in the feeling of pain,

I enjoyed the newly explained magical rain,

that angel taught me great things, 

the sun sets, the hope doesn’t,

like the evening of summer,

and warmth of sun in winter,

she taught me not to chase love but be love,

I realised that like the sand in a person’s hand this life shall too pass in notime, smoothly and effortlessly no matter how tightly you hold,

a gift not asked was given to me, a ball of love, goodness dripping from her melted the long siezed heart,I wonder a stranger she was or an angel disguised as a litle girl…. 

💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟

Do comment on this post!😊

Now that you have read so far I just wanted to say that hey, you look awesome today!😊So smile😀

Maybe…..

Maybe the sun did always shine this bright, 

maybe  for true fairytales there exist no ends, 

maybe the days were best but my thoughts weren’t

maybe the grass was always this green,

maybe the red was always so beautiful,

maybe the winds always kissed me,

maybe all the vibes just brought love to me,

maybe I always smiled this wide,

or is it just because you were here by my side,

to show me the colours of life so bright,

I would shine through the day,

I dreamt all night,

days &nights were all full of good vibes,

a book I read twice and thrice,

I would fly in the air

and talk to the walls,

here I slip and  you would catch me there,

then why did you leave with scars so deep,

you took that smile, the stars and my sweet sleep,

the nights we exchanged thoughts, words, love,  dreams and muchmore,

whom do I explain this to,

how do I bound those in words,

memories craved in my heart give pain so deep

that it sheds tears of blood just in the memory of love,

eyes full of water but look here I stand with another fake smile,

maybe you still love me or maybe you never did,

hope to see you back, 

though I know you’ll never come,

you shine in my thoughts like the stars in the sky,

all scattered and broken but true beauty beholden by sky,

not just letters and poems  were the little pieces of love,

to name infinity  I  craved your name in sky and stars that I love,

the fragrance of you I wish I could capture in a diamond jar, to remember you in some other way when you are so far,

the roses turned black and thorns don’t hurt,

so did the heart which you did curse,

strangers I see but in face of my love for few seconds I dream and come back to the real world,

how much I miss you the infinity would describe,

and the love never ending you will always find in the sludge of my grave…..