I had dressed to decieve but…. 

Look here I wiped my tears, I woke up again from hate and despair,

I decided to dress to decieve ,  so that I don’t reveal the pain and greif, 

I showered with the scent of jasmine, I wiped myself with the cream,

I attired myself in the full sleeve dress so the beauty of cuts I made on my wrist and the lines made on my soft skin from that sharp knife don’t get revealed,

I put the mascara to hide those puffed eyes, which are desperate to tell that I cried all night,

I thought of how I am  gonna do my hair, which reminded me of those rough hands which played with my hair ,

I wish I could take a time machine and live that moment again and so I did, I bit my lips again to stop my tears  and I rushed down the stairs to seek my time machine, I opened the cupboard and sat by the sofa with that big album, my time machine,

I saw you smiling at the very first page and for the zillionth time my heart broke in grief,

you captured my heart which was a fire and kind of art but you droped it so hard that my whole world was burnt,

I remembered I was covering myself with a coat of “Im okay” and I headed to the dressing table, 

I stared at the mirror, like you my eyes also fascinate me somedays, when I look deep into them I see my whole world and amazingly all I see is you, 

I caked on the makeup and rushed towards the kitchen and I poured the wine in the glass and I felt  like I had lost my last breath with the just a glass, 

it looked like the sky was in pain too,  when I saw the black clouds covering the sun’s face,

the forecast was wrong and the strom of grief  was about to come, I wish I had doubted not the forecast but also you and promises you made randomly out of the blue,

I stepped out of the house and same as all the days I wore a fake smile on my face and it begun to rain and I was cleansed from bottom to the top and to the greatest depths of my heart, and corpse in my body then got burnt, 

my emotions went numb and I was scattered into infinite pieces like never before, my broken pieces got revealed, the heart so stabbed was freezed as hard as steel, 

I wish that we would have never met, I wish the destiny should have not knit this story of threat I got the love I always wished for, I wish I had wished for it to last, 

but then I smiled in pain , I was happy not because I was betrayed because before the betrayal I  was loved, I loved the most beautiful lie, the most attractive illusion the destiny had presented infront of me,

I loved from all my heart, I gave it all I had and   I loved like the fire in stars no matter how beautiful it looks you’ll never be worthy of touching it, I felt like the storm trapped in  a rain drop and so I cried out my heart, 

from head to toe  I felt so healed,silence was my loudest scream,   I felt its okay to cry sometimes, doesn’t the sky do the same and we call it rain,

You see I had dressed to decieve the world so well,  but the rain revealed me and this is me for forever, beautiful and healed .


91 Replies to “I had dressed to decieve but…. ”

  1. When you feel it ,it is soo hard to take love failures.But believe me it is better than death of loved ones.You can find love again,but at the moment of time you feel like you are crushed down to earth with unknown forces of emotions.And however you dressed to decieve,your eyes strip your soul.Because eyes can’t hide.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. True it is eyes speak what’s in heart, fortunately I have never had a love failure all the love I gave has come back to me. Your words are true power thou, Thank you so much for reading and commenting😊!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Modi😂I kind of did you know mess doesn’t get over so quick, trying to distract myself maybe I m in library, saturday for me is book, friends and party day but today its just books.Happy saturday to you too!👍

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Haha, nothing like that its straight way no, I can’t stuff shit in my life I have enough relationships, friends and family are only too hard to handle ,and already much mess created no space for other drama now

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You will get better stuff as time goes, Its not like I have never really liked a guy but I have bigger goals in life and my stuff in life may get clear but after I m at a stage that I satisfy myself with all I need, then I can think of it, see you around my friend is here, bye!

        Liked by 1 person

      1. Like an aadha card number,for every girl ” she is not single” is mandatory..whenever I ask a girl about her friend this is exact answer I would get..I don’t know how every girl is committed and yet boys are single..are they dating with other planet guys

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I am just kidding..Long distance wont work I maximum cases..anyway whatever I say don’t take seriously..because I say most other things for fun..see you are just laughing for every comment I made..u like to make people laugh..but when I make girls laugh..as I am boy..it’s bliss for my harmones

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Very well written the pain ,memories .I lived the last lines .Well done dear😍.Just a small advice ,add some pictures in your post to embellish your art .It will add more charms in it😘

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow! This is great! i love how you describe concealing yourself just to have it all revealed by the rain. I also love your unique writing style. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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